qupada

Bold of you to assume you’re going to be the one to outlive a 90s printer.

Step 1: blender

Step 2: ???

Step 3: profit

Often it’s attached to a motor, but the pointy end hasn’t changed much.

Certainly juicing the likes of apples or carrots warrants a different kind of appliance, but squashing citrus is a fairly solved problem.

“Method and apparatus for insufflation of oxygen into a body by means of flexible permeable membrane”

Frankly an average tortoise has a good chance of outliving your grandchildren.

150 years is not an unreasonable upper bound for their lifespan, for the larger species.