BREAD THAT CAN’T LEGALLY BE CALLED BREAD???!!!

Could be a CPAP mask strap mark, but this is better.

How to unstuck hands from Pringles can

Sorry, now you’ll inadvertently think of it every time you see a morgue. Have fun!

Hell yeah 😎

But the savings haven’t flowed down to us. Gotta make line go up, it seems.

Their plan to cougar up the neighborhood has been foiled once again.

squints

It’s 2030. The conscription age has been increased to 65, and the 50 year old cohort is now in the lotto for the monthly draft call-ups.

The Strait of Hormuz (called the Strait of Trump) is still contested, as is the Persian Gulf (now called the Persian Gulf of America). Kharg Island is a battered pile of rubble, but thousands of casualties a day, mostly from FPV drone strikes, fail to move the needle.

The backlash in the US is high but since the midterms and 2028 election were cancelled, dissent is starting to take a more [ Removed by Reddit ] approach.

A few centuries pass. It is 2236, and America is still bombing the Middle East. Mecha-Trump still doesn’t have full control over the Strait of Trump, which he blames is just a hoax perpetrated by Biden, and asserts that Total Victory has been achieved, while sending another 200k conscripts into Iran again.

Could microfiche make a comeback with this?

So like a fox, but fake in a Fr*nch way

So their app description is lying?

Sorry, you can’t. However, you can look at his ever increasingly shiny leather jackets!

Do they share a bed? Alabama style?

If you’re cluckin delighted then you’d’ve cluckin hired me motherclucker

I 'member when it was a five dollar footlong.

Best news of the decade.

Coca-Cola^® and Pepsi^® products in the same vending machine? What sort of corporate heresy is this?

Yet another marriage ruined by Big Towel. Smh my head